I'm not gonna live by what I see

Both mentally and physically tired.
But I will continue to declare God's goodness and favour on me.

I'm not gonna live by what I see.
I'm not gonna live by what I feel.
Deep down I, know that You're here with me.
I know that You can do AAAANYYYTHIINGGG!

Through You, I can do anything.

God knows

You know the first week of something new, I'm swimming and swimming, sometimes it feels like I'm drowning, but I know it in my heart that God is kind and He will show me His kindness.

Get set

A new beginning : Where the worries of my past will be forgotten.
When it comes, I wanna be ready.

?

Why am I sitting here for?
What am I doing?
Should or shouldn't I be doing something?

Double agent

What goes into your mouth does not make you 'unclean'. It's what comes out of your mouth that makes you unclean.

Water reflects your reflection. The heart reflects who you really are.

I sigh when I see Christians are the biggest hypocrites.

I'm not saying that I'm better than anybody. I'm also not perfect. But I try to live by the Word.

Sometimes, most of the time, claimed Christians can be the worst.

You talk so much like you know everything and you look down on others.

You claim to be one of Jesus's followers, but you don't live like one.

Instead you slander and you gossip.

You never set a good example.

Shame on you.

Guess what?

It sucks to be the blur one, always.
It also sucks so bad to be the one taken advantaged of by the so called "I'm your friend".

"If you're my friend, you would have done this for me"

Lies.

That person is just making full used of you.
If you were my friend, you should also understand me.

I used to think that I should be friends with everyone- good or bad. So that I'm excluded from the Loner's club. I thought that when I'm friends with everyone, and if they like me, then I won't have enemies. I was even more willing to pay an expensive price like getting myself hurt and not them by being Miss Nicey Nice. When I was 10, I took in all the blame when one of my 'friends' betrayed me and got me into trouble with my teacher. The result was that I got humiliated in front of the whole class for more than an hour, and also I got caned by the teacher. In the end, I moved out of that town.
The little girl who thought that if she took in all the humiliation and suffering by herself, get it over and done and pretend like it never happened before would never need to worry about not getting any friends.
Even now, in my group project, no one (except 1 or 2 friends who were with me and was willing to share in) was thankful that some members actually sacrificed to clean up the shit. For my side, this was how they thank:"You did that? It wasn't even you who did that," and "I don't know what am I supposed to do. I wasn't in charge of it,"

Dumbfounded.

You know what?

A friend I knew said this in her blog:

I realized that not everybody loves everybody. That not everybody has everybody's back. That some friends aren't who they seem to be.

I don't need a gadzillion friends. I just need a couple of friends who'd love me as much as I love them.

It seems like the ones on the social status list are Dominators by default. The pretty ones, the smart ones, the rich ones, the popular ones and especially the Talker, the overall Queen who manipulates.
Come to think about it, I'd rather be alone than to be present in your little world.
I do not want to be involved in all your dramas.
I thought that by having friends like you would make my life less miserable. The more the merrier right? But now, I will make my decision. Who I want to be friends with.

Friends who call you when they need you are not friends.
They take. They expect. They don't contribute.

Emily and Charlie Perform 'Break Again'

Charlie Puth and Emily Luther. Way tha' go! :D

Clueless Pain

Ughhhh! I just don't get it. How am I supposed to please everyone, every time, everywhere.
I really don't get it.
What did I do to actually get this kind of treatment from you(s).
Maybe it was just one mistake, but often people remember that one mistake I made and not the hundreds of good stuffs I did for them and the good times we had.

I finally found the root cause of this perfectionism inside of me.

It's killin' me man, and it's very... very... tiring for me. Lord, save me!

As far as I remember, that first mistake was yours. It has caused us to where we are now.

Two Things

A quiet person who works hard and succeeds at the end of the day deserves admiration more than the one who boasts a lot but slacks in his work.

***

It's not nice to b**** about others on social media network and then organize your words with hidden meanings about that person, thinking OR hoping he she will read it or something. What's the point man? Just tell it straight to his her face or talk it out with him or her if you're their friends.

Seriously...

Time wasted, again!

The funny thing is that...

After switching on my keyboard, telling myself that I'll do some improving time (aka practice), I'll switch to blogging and FB and then this little fella at home would barge into my room and glue his buttocks on the sit and he starts playing and exploring my keyboard. Thrice!

I gota be more discipline eh!

The Remnants

There are some more remnants that I still need to forgive.

I'll know it, that when I have completely forgiven you[s], is that when I stop tearing whenever I think about it.

Note : This is not a dark emo post. I'm far from that.